Essential Skills for Life

How critical lessons in self awareness, emotional maturity, and conflict resolution determine success and satisfaction.

I've been reading a book called How We Love Our Kids by Milan and Kay Yerkovich. I had read their groundbreaking book on relationships How We Love many years ago, and was eager to dive into this one now that I am parenting a pre-teen. I found their main points fascinating, convicting, and thought provoking.

The author asserts that in a healthy home with good parenting, children develop three essential abilities:

1. The capacity to see oneself clearly.

2. The expertise to deal effectively with a wide range of emotions.

3. The capability to repair relationships by dealing with conflict and reaching resolution.

I couldn't help but think how much I struggled in certain seasons of my life because I didn't have these abilities.

I also feel grateful for where I am in my life now that I am finally starting to learn these lessons and practice these skills. It takes ongoing effort and humility, but the reward is peace and satisfaction in my closest relationships.

How critical these lessons are to learn, and yet how few examples we have around us that show this level of emotional maturity and skill in interpersonal communication.

How self aware are you? Are you able to see your strengths and weaknesses clearly?

How well do you do with a wide range of emotions? How do you cope with frustration and stressful situations? Do the more extreme emotions of depression or anger make you uncomfortable when you see them in others, or in yourself?

How well do you handle conflict in your closest relationships?

Self awareness is the first step in changing toward being more mindful, present, and and engaged in your relationships. We are all broken people with mistakes in our past and present, but we don't always have to be that way. It is how we respond to these difficulties that determines what is important, and we do not have to be defined by the labels we so often place on ourselves and others.